COUNTDOWN..

So, Beyoncé's video for COUNTDOWN has become like my FAVE video of hers, moreso than GREEN LIGHT, which was like my ultimate fave...well tied with GET ME BODIED...but I looooved it.

All of the Audrey-isms...it excited me, I'm still shrilling in excitement from the vividness of it all. I wish her the best with her baby...it's weird how much I've grown to where I can say that and NOT be hateful toward her. I felt so conflicted on the inside, marveling at her creativity but feeling disgusted by the bravado, but why not be brave? Be brave and embrace that beautiful swan, that gilded golden egg...that wondrous high of creativity..and keep it flowing. I let it ebb and flow, it leaves me ...then it returns..I can't imagine what it'd be like to feel creatively inspired more than just in a whim...I mean like ACTUALLY feeling creative each and every day, no slumps.. Notice I didn't say ALL day , but every day..
I'm totally supposed to be asleep but a lovely little cousin of mine exposed me to a wondrous list of methods to be inspired/creative/aroused...creatively : ) ...I'm exxxcited.. my life is changing. I can feel it. I should get my Dreamgirls on and break out into the song Jennifer Hudson sang in that tired wig...but I won't..I'll just observe. I've lost so MUCH this year, and gained a lot of priceless experiences and wisdoms. I have to hold on to the gains and accept the losses as sunk costs. Yes, economics is actually applicable to my life. Who would've guessed?!

XOX..